17th Sunday in Ordinary Time, July 29, 2012
Fr. Joseph Eddy, O. de M.
(Full sermon text) As preschoolers and Kindergarteners, we are taught to share our toys with our classmates. This is an extremely important lesson, but it is a difficult one, too. Children naturally are a bit selfish. They think, “Why should I share when it is much better for me to keep everything for myself?” Good teachers will strive to persuade these “little ones” to take their minds off themselves and consider the other’s needs.
The emperor’s sunken boats, a volcanic lake, and a famous sanctuaryA man full of life and of the Lord’s love, Fr. Tony Fortunato, O. de M. explains the significance of the famous Sanctuary of the Holy Crucifix in Nemi, Italy, and the history of the Mercedarian friary there. View it on our YouTube channel.
Visit the Mercedarians’
It is at these moments that we first learn to consider ourselves as part of a greater community. The lessons of sharing begin at tender ages, but they must be continually learned and perfected throughout our life. We all have a responsibility to give of our time, talent, and treasure to help others.
Learned in the family
Certainly the primary place for learning these lessons is in the family. It is at the family dinner table that we learn to pass the dish of food from one member to the other. This is such a simple task, but one that can teach us so much! We must take some food, but consider the other as well. If we take too much then maybe we are depriving our brother or sister of their share. These and so many other concrete lessons of compassion and consideration for the other are learned in the family.
Then, as we grow into young adulthood we move out of the house and inevitably “fall in love” with another. We want to marry, and sacrifice everything for the other person. The lessons of “self-gift” continue as husband and wife together with God bring about new life. For husband and wife this is a new opportunity to practically learn the lessons we learned from our mothers, “it is better to give than to receive.” Children demand of the married couple a gift of self; of money, of time…of all that they have.
School of virtue
But what if society’s basic unit began to crumble? Today over 50% of marriages in the United States end in divorce. In many practical ways, this threatens family life. God created the family, husband and wife, to be a “school of virtue” where children learn how to live as responsible citizens in society. Virtuous family life is the foundation of any healthy society. This is where we learn to put others’ needs before our own.
It is no surprise today that the millennial generation is increasingly afraid of getting married. Many are even beginning to say that marriage’s time has passed or it is better just to live together. There is much fear today. We are afraid to give because we know the pain of rejection and abandonment. Paralyzed by fear, we can’t open ourselves up to a complete gift of self. But what about the words that mom or grandma use to say, “It is better to give than to receive.” This seems true, but our young people do not have many examples of this today. A psychiatrist told me that the biggest issue with many couples seeking counseling to save their marriage is “control.” We are not willing to give up control, because we are afraid of being hurt. So we put up walls to protect ourselves.
Antidote to individualism
What should we do? Well, as Catholics we are people of hope and not despair. There is always hope for all of us no matter what we have gone through. Pope Benedict XVI says that the Eucharist is the ultimate antidote to modern individualism. In the Blessed Sacrament we see Calvary. Jesus says to each one of us “This is my body.” “This is my blood given up for you.” Our Lord holds nothing back in his self-gift. The Pope goes on to say that the Eucharist “…works in minds and hearts…continually disseminates (the)…logic of communion, of service, of sharing…”
The book of Genesis tells us that we are each created in the Image of God. God is Trinity; three persons and one God. God himself is a communion of persons united and yet distinct. The Second Vatican council tells us that we only find ourselves when we make a sincere gift of self to another person. Marriage and family is the ultimate invitation to self-gift. Marriage is a school to teach us to be a gift to the other as Jesus was on the cross and is to us always in the Eucharist.
Eucharist teaches us
So let us not despair in the struggles of our time. Instead, we must lead our young people to the source and summit of our faith, the Eucharist. There we allow the Eucharist to teach us to give of ourselves totally for the other person. In receiving the Lord, we discover what real sacrifice is and in making a self-gift to others we truly find ourselves.